Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
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