brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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