I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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