i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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