i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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