Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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