AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
