Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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