just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
