she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize