Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
