Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
