Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Randomize
