Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
