I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
