Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
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