READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
