So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
