I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
So much rum. So many feels.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
