i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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