Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
