No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
