we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
whose parrot is this?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
