It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize