What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you win again, gameday.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Blood and glitter go together right?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Randomize
