That's intense
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
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Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
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I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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