A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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