but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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