TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize