Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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