I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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