well most of my day revolves around power hour
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
