That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
