God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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