its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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