Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I deserve to be covered in dicks
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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