Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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