physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
It was confusing and full of hummus
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
