i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize