so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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