There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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