well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize