You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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