It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
