you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
