I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
