i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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