oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
