i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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