i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
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